Class of 2014 recruited based on Obama-like qualities

In the most competitive year for admissions to the College yet, an admissions insider informed us that the Class of 2014 has been selected not only for their academic and extracurricular excellence, but also for their resemblance to President Barack Obama CC '83.

Applicants were judged on how frequently they used the phrases “let me be clear” “change isn't easy” and "make no mistake" in their personal statements, while a special supplement asked them to write a response to a passage from the president’s best selling memoir, Dreams From My Father.

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