When you hear screams coming from every direction tonight, don’t freak out. It’s not a gang of iPhone bandits, it’s Primal Scream!
At midnight tonight, the whole campus will sing in harmony of the stresses of life at Columbia. (Considering we’ve been ranked the biggest pressure cooker, I’m thinking it will sound a little something like Rebecca Black’s hit “Friday.”)
So I bet you’re wondering, which primal scream personality am I?
The trying-not-to-seem-girly grunter: You’re pretty worried all of your bros are going to disown you if you unleash a girly scream, so you go for the manliest grunt possible. If you watched the YouTube compilation of Maria Sharapova’s grunting at any point in the past 24 hours, this is you.
