It's late. You're up. Good luck with midterms!
Oh Canada: True to form, a ring of devious and dastardly thieves grabbed headlines in a heist that shocked Canadians to their core. Their crime? Stealing 1,000 barrels of maple syrup.
Costco sells everything, literally: The discount retail giant made splashes in the rarefied world of art dealing, by announcing its decision to begin selling fine art online, including works by Matisse and Warhol. Hey, if Steve Martin can get in the business, who's to say that Costco can't?
A conspiracy that reaches up to the highest levels: America's unemployment rate has dipped below 8% for the first time since the 2008 recession. This would normally be a cause national jubilation, except for the fact that this is clearly an electioneering stunt perpetrated by our Kenyan president, Barack Hussein Obama.
